Why Do Women Have to Put Up With This?

Shoshana Roberts had a friend film her while walking through New York City for a day. This is what they captured… Some men are nice, some are rude, but… would they talk to another guy the same way? I thought so…

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87 Responses to Why Do Women Have to Put Up With This?

  1. teddvee says:

    was she the only woman walking the streets? how come the men aren’t showing the same type of attention to the other women? is it because the other women aren’t dressed in clothes that hug their bodies? something to think about. clothes are made for people to be covered and NOT discovered.

    Liked by 1 person

    • anon says:

      Seriously? She was covered, it wasn’t like she was showing cleavage or wearing a short skirt! Can a woman not look beautiful if she doesn’t want to be harassed?

      Like

      • DONALD says:

        are you really this ““` woman dress to be recognized , that’s the point of tight clothes ,make up and so on . if she were dressed in office clothes in the same area the response would have been completely different .

        Like

    • Redhead says:

      She was wearing tight jeans and tight tee shirt. I would like her to do this over with a loose shirt and long skirt. Then one made with a cute guy walking down the same street with tight jeans and tight tee shirt. Then put the guy in a loose jogging outfit. Then You could really see what the difference is. This is just one perspective and not a good one at that.

      Like

  2. Hisbeloved Queenie says:

    Okay, this is just stupid, what’s wrong with smiling, and keeping it moving. They didn’t touch her, they spoke, or they tried to get her attention. Is she a dike, does she not like men, that she would go to such lengths to call this harassment??? Personally I see entrapment.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Darrah says:

    seriously ???? wait till the day comes that NO ONE will give her the time of day,,,,, you don’t stay attractive forever !!!

    Like

  4. Lola says:

    Most of the comments sounded pretty harmless! Most women don’t walk around town for ten hours looking for something to complain about!
    There was a time not too long ago that people in public actually spoke to each other on the street. As long as the communication is respectful. What is wrong wit it?
    people today don’t know how to enjoy life, and each other! So sad ! Really !
    Lighten up girl it took you 10 whole hours to get a few borderline disrespectful remarks!
    Geez! Louise!

    Liked by 2 people

  5. Kim says:

    I agree with Lola and, how would you stop street harassment anyway?

    Like

  6. Gaga says:

    How would anyone think they could end street harassment? As long as there are people on the street there will be harassment. And, who would donate to a non-profit that thinks they can accomplish that? Seriously?

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Nan says:

    Lola makes a good point. Some were innocent enough, but as the video progressed and the areas changed, the interaction or “requests” to interact were unmistakably harassment and very disconcerting. I actually felt in some instances the personal boundaries were so disrespected that the girl was in danger of physical assault.

    Like

  8. Elvisian says:

    Its depends on ‘what are you whearing’.

    Some closets sometimes give a message: ‘come and get me’, ‘hey guys i’m looking for someone… ‘

    Like

  9. Sandra Lent says:

    I agree with Lola. I heard nothing that I would consider verbal abuse. What I saw was a nice looking female that was being rude. What is wrong with a compliment? Maybe if you spoke these men wouldn’t call you out your name. “No thank you” is all it would have taken. Since when is a compliment harassment? Get over yourself. Walking around for 10 hours fishing for compliments just so you can act like you’re better than someone else. SMH. Most women would be flattered.

    Like

  10. o.okay says:

    This is New York. The BIG APPLE. Try doing that in some other city.

    Like

  11. Gyrannon says:

    Article Poster says “would they talk to another guy the same way? I thought so…”

    You obviously live in a rich family that protects you from ants, gives you thousands of dollars for useless shoes you probably will never wear, and don’t have a damn clue about how the REAL WORLD works!
    I’m a guy. Guess what? I WAS HIT ON IN PORTLAND BY GUYS! Not NYC, in PORTLAND OREGON!

    This article was clearly made by one of those “anti-everything-to-do-with-men” women that THINK that because some douche treated them slightly bad, that all guys MUST be absolutely pricks…

    And did you SERIOUSLY expect her 10 HOUR meaningless walk to NOT have at least 10 bad apple comments? You are an idiot… If I’m walking through one of the most dangerous cities of the world, I’m not gonna be expecting a polite hug, I’m more likely to expect the American Psycho to bump into me!

    Do you know what a real woman would do? Look at pricks and say “Back off”.
    Women gets threatened or feels threatened? Mace or Taser? Your banshee given voice maybe?
    Real women KNOW how to deal with this crap, REAL women DON’T put up with shit, they make sure that guys know “she’s not in the mood” and most guys will back away.
    Meet a few psychos, lunatics, sociopaths? Guess what, *whisper* guys don’t like them either!

    Wake up, the world isn’t safe, it never will be. Too much freedom and the nuts roam free. Too much security and those wearing the law think they are above it.

    Like

  12. joe says:

    She dressed da art tha least she could of done is at least
    say something back. Some ppl were just being polite. She seemed so Stuck up

    Like

  13. Paula says:

    Harrasment…really?????????????????

    Like

  14. Syvastian says:

    Thats why eastern women like the burqa.

    Like

  15. ugwuify01 says:

    hmm, that’s something to think about!

    Liflblog.WordPress.com

    LIVE YOUR BEST LIFE!

    Like

  16. John Lelliott says:

    Geez !!! whats the matter ? Don’t women like compliments…Miserable Moo !!

    Like

  17. caroline says:

    I think there is a lot worse things that could be said to a woman, I think you should lap the compliments up and smile.

    Like

  18. Dramafarma says:

    How the hell are most of those comments harrassment …. Christ we women have gotten precious … This is NOT feminism, its nothing but out and out whinging.

    Like

  19. Yasir Imran says:

    So many people are saying things like , “have a good day” “good day” etc So what is wrong in it. Yup there is little harassment too but never mind. In India people rape such a girl moving on the street, so not a big deal if someone tries to talk.

    Like

    • Jones says:

      When u seek attention, u get attention , harassment , she shouldn’t walk around revealing her business like , wear more appropriate clothes , when u give people something to look at they gonna look and say wat they feel , she’s a attention seeker , ain’t nobody harassing , that’s wat she get for no self respect!!

      Like

    • Emily says:

      They rape women here too. A lot more often than you’d think. It generally starts with comments like these…

      Anyone who thinks this is okay might want to consider if they would want their mother or sisters experiencing this. If they are men, would it be cool if gay men did this to you?

      How about not sexualizing women at every single point in their lives and just looking at them as if they were actually people?

      Like

      • Eric says:

        would your mother or sister be walking around alone in some of those areas? Gotta use some common sense.

        Like

      • Eric> Let’s just teach men not to objectify and rape women. Women should be able to walk wherever and wear whatever they want without men accosting them. Wise up and evolve already.

        Like

    • b.j. says:

      There was a lot of folks with compliments that were real nice. Also you look like you were being a snob

      Like

    • Jon says:

      Pakistan and the Middle East have the most crazy people and believes. They dress women in so they are completely covered and if they walked out like that then they are raped.

      Like

    • Joanna says:

      “In India people rape such a girl moving on the street …” is akin to saying that in Pakistan, girls get shot for attending schools – although the latter would be much closer to the truth. I have travelled across India, I have had some unpleasant experiences, and I have read and heard about the rapes in India – but that does not warrant the kind of a sweeping generalization you have made. And as for your views on “little harassment” – well, coming as you do, from a country that does not exactly have a stellar record of respecting the rights, freedom and dignity of women, you will not understand how demeaning the “little harassment” can be to women.

      Like

    • ward says:

      Are you idiot? Wtf is wrong with you??

      Like

    • hana says:

      Before blaming countries like India think about your country.

      No rights for womens, burkha for womens, terrorism machine. No education, poor people.

      Like

    • gigi says:

      that doesnt make it right!

      Liked by 1 person

  20. Susan says:

    I did think the guy who “followed” her was creepy and intimidating and some of the comments were rude however more of the comments were very innocent gestures of kindness and I agree that she was more rude than they were by not even giving the polite guys a response of some kind. Does it hurt to tell people have a nice day. Get a life lady.

    Like

  21. Victor says:

    Instead I would donate money to organizations that help people in more needs, such as children cancer funds.

    Like

  22. Are you kidding? Donate to end street harassment? It’s not possible to end this…It’s been going on since streets were built, and women walked to their destinations. Even if she was walking with another women or several, harassment wold occur,

    Like

  23. natasja says:

    Harrasment? Donate you for kind of being rude on the street? Thats sick 2 ask😳✨
    Try now the other way. Walk with a smile and a smirk on your face, mabe you will attract positive attention for a change.😊👍

    Like

  24. The Irony ….. Media of such “civilized” countries are busy criticizing Muslim countries for the rights and freedom of women 🙂

    Like

  25. Jarmaine says:

    They should have another video showing the girl in a different outfit…. let see if the guys will talk to her the way….IMHO.

    Like

  26. Twin says:

    Maybe what u should do is holla back there’s nothing wrong with that. You obviously don’t belong around people. I guess she needs to feel important and wants to be talked to by other type of men in different situations (doctors in a hospital, millionaire in front of mansion, college kid in dorm just a few examples) or maybe she’s a lesbian upset that men step up to what they like and are willing to get shut down and you won’t say two words to that girl you like. I’m from nyc and this girl shows how stuck up girls make them selves look ugly . No I’m not that guy walking beside you for five minutes lol . I I could go on about this subject but I won’t just kill yourself if all them compliments don’t get yo pussy wet when u go night night ug mug.

    Like

  27. Sensible says:

    btgg
    If a brain surgeon put up posters promoting the magazines she has in her office or a professor promotes his class by the pizza he serves after exams, you can expect them to attract the type of clientele, and the comments that those advertisements attract. This would be true even if every medical journal would tout the doctor or professor as the most skilled and sophisticated available.
    This woman certainly has valuable, respectable qualities such as intelligence, talent, concern. In this particular excursion, she is choosing to advertise aspects of herself that she seems not to feel are her main areas of value – but please don’t complain about the clientele you are attracting (forget male/female, focus on class) or the communication they are using.
    If you wear a business suit, or dress without your lowest form of attraction promoted, you will find people appreciating deeper aspects of you, and using more sophisticated forms of communication to make the connection…

    Like

    • If you honestly think that a woman walking in a business suit would not garner the same comments, you’re delusional and don’t know the debased attitude of most men out on the streets. You’ve been isolated in a cubicle too long, but I like that you are more evolved than most men. 🙂

      Like

  28. slimwk says:

    woman body is all sexy even movement and gestural of womens … something normal that men get attracted by women isn’t true ???
    i think wearing slim jeans and slim shirt to show the all body mean that women harasing men in the street by watching her sexy walk right !!! the opposite we see in this video she make an harassment to men in the street special beautiful girls

    the media and the fashion selling sex in da street without sex …. open your eyes people

    Like

    • I hope you have to go to prison and Big Bubba finds you “special beautiful” and your “body is all sexy,” and its “movement and gestural”in your prison uniform “show the all body” you possess. Maybe then you’d understand that this is harassment.

      Like

  29. hskiprob says:

    Women go through a lot of effort to be attractive to others and just like in the animual kingdom males often make bolds effort to attack females. Obvioulsy different males have different methods of trying to attract a female and for various purposes and diffferent females have different ideas of how they want to affect the males. Obviously the is one of the methods used by female prostitutes to attract potential business, which is commonly known and conducted more in certain areas than others. It does however appear to me that there are always jerks in any situation and thinking that it would be different in this situation is a bit naive. This is not someting that I would recommend doing as a woman, unless you are willing to be a bit tolerant.

    Like

    • Thanks for sharing your knowledge of prostitutes and how they walk the streets. This woman however, was not a prostitute. Yet she endured catcalls and unwanted attention. Men are just pigs…admit it. You are one.

      Like

  30. Liam says:

    All the comments were just banter and quite harmless. But walking next to someone for a few mins is a no no and intimidation. I always say treat people how you like to be treated yourself. With kindness and dignity.

    Like

  31. Kari says:

    This is just ridiculous. And some of the guys are just greeting her, not ‘harassing’ her. I agree with the above though….what normal woman walks the street for that long? Of course it would seem like harassment after listening to those comments for 10 hours!! Only prostitutes walk the streets for long periods of time and they WANT guys to say those things to them!! LOL. And my goodness, you think you can collect money to end harassment on the street?!?!?! What the heck are you going to do with that $$$ to end people from talking? Yes, talking….it’s a free country. Lighten up, people, and stop trying to make a controversy over nothing. I think we SHOULD talk more to each other instead of looking at our phones and ignoring humans all day. And if you are a sensitive woman to cat calls, just wear some earphones, listen to some rockin’ music and keep your head high. You obviously are beautiful, so be happy in that. Ridiculous, silly, pointless video. Sorry if I offend anyone. You can write an article on how we should try to stop the heinous crimes of writing comments that disagree with articles. 😛

    Like

    • Parts of your comments are very sweet and naive. I suggest you read the rest of the comments in order to see the different sides to this issue. Oh, and she walked around the streets and listened to the comments for 10 hrs. because this was an experiment.
      And Gina solidified the jest of it in her comment below.

      Like

  32. Stacey says:

    I didn’t hear anything disrespectful. She got a lot of compliments, maybe they weren’t wanted oe appreciated but I heard nothing I would find offensive. She in the other hand wouldn’t even return a helli which I consider rude. I do not agree with people harassing anyone but they did not make a for this. What the bell is wrong with us today. Everything people do is taking out of context.

    Like

  33. Red says:

    Might be because it’s NYC. I live in the south and men here are a little different and not so in your face and forward in public. It’s more like a big smile, a “hello”, and open doors for you sort of thing.

    Like

  34. joya says:

    I thinks someone with this type of jeans deserves to hear something….

    Like

    • She deserves to hear something like what? Catcalls? Comments about her ass? No matter what a woman wears, it doesn’t give men the right to treat her like an object. Get it through your head (to quote Gina from a post below) “UNSOLICITED COMMENTS FROM RANDOM STRANGERS ABOUT A WOMAN’S APPEARANCE ARE NOT ACCEPTABLE REGARDLESS OF THE CONTEXT!”

      Like

  35. Hayley says:

    not just New York, it’s all over the world, out of all of those men , I’d be concerned about the idiot who walked beside her for 5 minutes , that guy has a problem, saying hello to someone isn’t harassment , but if we reply to it then he would take it as a green light to talk more, and she did the right thing by keeping quiet, shame some of those men didn’t do the same

    Like

  36. Edward Williams says:

    Not a big deal. US is safe. Think it like this if you are a muslim girl your own father, brothers will fuck you and if you complain they may sell you to an old guy. Not a big deal for them.

    Like

    • 2 out of 3 of those things happen everyday in the US. We may not sell the young girls to old men, but I guarantee you a young girl get abused by her father and brother everyday in the US.

      Like

  37. chauneed says:

    smh i like how people are acting as if these men are saying hi just to say hi, most of those were piggish men who couldnt control their mouths. screaming damn as u watch a womans ass walk away that loud is ridiculous and lets not even get on the fact that men literally followed her…back then menacted like gentlemen and though some of those were harmless most of those were sexual

    Like

  38. Georgina Belmonte says:

    Soy de argentina, entiendo el punto, si lo hubieran filmado aca, seria peor, directamente te dicen groserias explicitas. Estaria muy bueno que alguien lo haga aca. Asi esta este pais. Bendiciones

    Like

  39. Gina says:

    Many people think that the behavior in this video is OK…. firstly gender bias and the sexualisation of women is one of the biggest human rights violations in the world that constantly get’s trivialized. Why is gender equality important? Because it affects everything from the job you choose to the levels of violence we see towards women, boys and girls. It is a deep complex issue and unless you’ve studied it in great detail your opinion on the subject is probably greatly flawed as exhibited on the Facebook comments about this video. Firstly lets be honest when a random male says hi to a random female in a city it isn’t friendliness more often than not its because he is trying to instigate something as he is attracted to her… attraction…that’s natural human behavior….if she says hi back that will encourage an approach so its understandable if women ignore strange men who say hi. That said good morning, hi, all fine greetings… as long as if you are ignored you don’t pursue or say anything else or a women may fear you’re a weirdo or a threat. This isn’t a debate about human attraction, this is about harassment which is a totally separate thing. Lets change the context….If the men in the video were saying ugly bitch, fat cow, hoar etc you would probably say…. They are harassing a perfect stranger in the street when she’s just walking around minding her own business…that’s wrong, that’s harassment, how dare they. When men say these kind of comments its because they don’t find a woman attractive and they are verbalizing their disapproval of that women’s appearance. Under those circumstances we would say who the hell does he think he is to judge that women, she didn’t seek his approval he is a complete stranger, how rude. But because you perceive what these men are saying in the video to be complimentary you think this behavior to be acceptable and less intimidating… some on Facebook go as far to say empowering! UNSOLICITED COMMENTS FROM RANDOM STRANGERS ABOUT A WOMANS APPEARANCE ARE NOT ACCEPTABLE REGARDLESS OF THE CONTEXT!!! If you feel the need to announce to a perfect stranger that you ‘approve’ or ‘disapprove’ of her looks you are objectifying a person and reducing them to nothing more than a sexualisation solely there for your happiness\approval. That is demeaning, controlling and intimidating and is called being a chauvinistic piggy. I quote, ‘Someone’s acknowledging you for being beautiful, you should say thank you’. Did she ask for his approval as to her appearance? Nope! Why should she give a flying f*** about some random dude ‘acknowledging’ her beauty, that somehow entitles him to a response or thank you because he used the word ‘beautiful?’ If you think that’s a polite or ok thing to do to a woman you need to go back to school, real men don’t behave in such a manner. ‘Smile’…..F*** OFF! Maybe her gran just died, maybe she’s in a bad mood, maybe she’d look like an axe murderer if she walked around with a permanent grin on her face…. Why should she have to edit her appearance in any way to seek approval and make a random guy who means nothing to her happy or give him any attention what-so-ever? And there in lies the lesson. The fact is women have the human right to walk down the road without receiving unsolicited approval or disapproval from random knob heads. Saying hi, good morning whatever fine but the moment you comment on a women’s physical appearance you have stepped into douchebag territory and it IS INTIMIDATING! We can apply the same logic to a random stranger calling a passing person on the street fat, a fag, a racial slur maybe. When you think that you have the right to dish out your approval or disapproval of another person based solely on their looks you officially are a harasser!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Jill says:

      Very very well said! I am 48 years old now, and it almost felt normal to not feel safe being around men in certain situations. But it isn’t normal at all.

      Like

    • You NAILED it with your post. I especially liked the crux of the issue in these words: “UNSOLICITED COMMENTS FROM RANDOM STRANGERS ABOUT A WOMAN’S APPEARANCE ARE NOT ACCEPTABLE, REGARDLESS OF THE CONTEXT!”
      It may take another generation or 2 before the men get this through their thick skulls.

      Like

  40. P says:

    Just be grateful people do actually acknowledge you.
    Everything is relative girl.
    1°) I’ve been walking this earth for 50yrs and 6 days now, and the people how tried to chat me up I can count on 1 hand. One ! I myself would trade anything just to be you for a day.
    2°) Ten or twenty yrs from now, no-one will even now you’re there anymore. Or hadn’t you realized that?
    So stop moaning girl!
    And if it really bothers you that much DO sth about it. Against the guys in questions, I mean, not here on some lame negative forum.
    Kick ass, not bytes!

    Like

  41. I’m afraid you all seem to miss the point here. Do you see this same thing happening to men walking down the street? Even if it was a man or woman making comments? No you don’t. Why is that? Chew on that thought for a moment. A man walks around NY for 10 hours as an experiment to show social interaction. I suspect he would get less than 10-20 comment compared to her 1,000 comments. I suggest, if they simply smiled, nodded and kept their mouth shut, most women would be happier with that kind of response. They may even get a smile back or a nice “hello” from the woman.

    Like

  42. Kevin wart says:

    move out of New York if you dont like thousands of people trying to talk trash. Peoe move to that crowded NYC and think that other people arent going to try to communicate with them? Especially a pretty girl? There are thousands and thousands of other cities in small town USA where u dont get harassed on that scale and you can raise your famies away from big city gangs, drugs and violence. All u have to do is move out of NYC… Most of Americans hate being defined by NYC to foreigners cause most of us arent like that. Its mostly unique to New York. Not common Americ. Move away and be respected!!!

    Like

  43. mjmsprt40 says:

    If you don’t want anybody to talk to you, ever, that can be arranged. All you have to do is move to a desert island. Viola! Nobody to make any comment whatsoever, the only voice you hear is your own!

    I am a man. People DO comment at least occasionally, and often I’ll reply back. No big deal. It’s not harassment just because somebody says “Hello, how ya doin'” or “How’s your day goin'” unless you’re wound so tight that anything said to you becomes harassment– in which case it must be really sad to be you.

    Like

  44. Jaclyn says:

    At least they where nice to you. I get harassed a lot when I’m out walking, I get grabbed, guys will walk in front of me pretending to grab my boobs, I’ve been sexually threatened, and almost kidnapped. Oh can’t forget the following me home, stalked.

    Like

  45. Jaclyn says:

    This right here would be a huge relief if the guys did stuff like that to me instead of what they normally do. Expecially when I have my son with me.

    Like

    • Gawd, I pity your life. Do you really need men leering at you and salivating at your body to be validated? I hope you learn that’s not all life’s about. I hope you learn some self respect, especially for your son’s sake, so he can treat females with dignity.

      Like

      • Jaclyn says:

        You just read and commented on my my first comment. I have called the police, also pepper sprayed a few, and ect.
        If my son ever did some crap like that to a woman I’d kick his butt myself.
        He knows better and is more of a man then any other male on this planet.

        You shouldn’t assume things.

        Like

      • Well, I am sorry if I disrespected you…I didn’t mean to. I just find it pitiful that this clip of her walking the streets and the reactions she got, would be a “relief” to you. I hope you can eventually move from your environment if it’s like that. Again, I sincerely apologize.

        Like

  46. Bharat says:

    If woman walk nude also..u don’t have rights to harass/tease her..this s even worse in india

    Like

  47. Ima Tiered says:

    I don’t quite get all this. Most guys seem to be just hoping for a smile or an acknowledgement. Yes a few move it up a notch, but frankly, wearing “Jeans” that look like they are spray painted on (not an excuse…..but it does make a man look!) and a T-shirt, dark as it may be, reveals a pretty decent breast size (again, not an excuse!). True, no cleavage showing, but none is needed when that shape is pretty much revealed! If you want to have a quiet walk, dress in attire that doesn’t have every man acting like a dog and wanting to hump that! If you dress like you want people to look, don’t complain when they do! And when someone says God bless you, I think an amen wouldn’t hurt her~!

    Like

    • I think you’re conditioned… maybe beyond repair. Just because a woman wears what she wants, does not give men the right to objectify her as a piece of meat. Instead of criticizing the woman, maybe we should just teach males to think and react with their brains, instead of the head in their pants.

      Like

  48. Mike says:

    Some rights-fighting organisations are running out of rights to fight for. They are desperate to find new battlefields to get donations. Anything but work, you know.

    Like

    • Women’s rights will continue to be an issue as long as the world societies continue to: sell women off as wives when they’re teenages, rape them, pay them less, and treat them unequally.

      Like

  49. Andreas Kastelholm says:

    WTF, harassment? She’s getting compliments! I’ve never ever walked up to a stranger and spoke to them, but that’s how you end up alone!

    Like

  50. ab3duh says:

    great post …. awesome

    Like

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